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Hidden Abuse within the LGBT Community

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Despite the fact that LGBT rights are coming out of the closet to the extent that lots of states possess the same-sex marriage rights, there is still much within the closet. One of these may be the fear creating hidden abuse: verbally, mentally, and physically. It is so hard for those who are abused to ask for help when they are still within the closet and are embarrassed to ask for assist with their dysfunctional, abusive relationship. They need the support of their family and friends to help and perhaps even save their lives.

This abuse is one thing that needs to be addressed. In general it comes from control issues of one person over another. Then your abused partner rationalizes the reasons the abuser does this stuff. Being the 'nice' person in the relationship, they feel the controller can change or get better.

The abuser may be secretively violent or controlling so that others outside of the relationship don't begin to see the abuse.

Sometimes the reason comes from alcohol, drugs, gambling, etc. In such cases the abuser may have to get into rehab, not only once however, many times before they are able to control their urges these illnesses cause.

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An anger management program might be necessary as well.

The abuser might not be able to see that there is a problem; many abusers don't realize there's a problem since they're 'out of it' when the abuse occurs and do not remember what happened. Others just want to be in denial that there is any difficulty; they are getting their demands met and do not mind about their partners needs or feelings.

Until these folks truly want to change, they'll lie to you, those around them, and also the professionals treating them

That is why I recommend couple's or family counseling. It is here their family and friends can keep the therapist-psychologist-psychiatrist informed of the truth of what's really going on or how things are progressing. Above all tell the truth too. Do not bow under from the bullying or threats to you from your partner about being truthful. This is a major step and misinformation will not help the recovery process.

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Left on their own they will make up stories to inform how well they're doing when in reality that could 't be the situation.

Even though the professionals hate to admit it, abusers are very good at deceiving everyone including their very own therapist-psychologist-psychiatrist. The abusers are doing this because this is their survival mode and are attempting to protect themselves any way they can. For this reason family and friends intervention can really help, however in many cases the abuser will try to reject everyone's help.

When the abuser is within a scenario where they will be married, they may say and swear up and down and backwards that things will change following the wedding. They will say it is the stress or pressure at this time and things can change. This is often the case by having an injury that they say things will be better following the injury gets better, but it has been entire time already. This also applies to drugs and smoking and so forth. Home theater system . get the idea. There'll always be an excuse to cover on their behalf so they can continue to abuse regardless of the problem is, thereby abusing themselves.

If you are going to make a big lifetime commitment like a wedding or buying a home, get these complaints looked after before you decide to enter any type of commitment, or else you will be in worse shape a considerably long time.

Again, this occurs to many people, but it is more hidden within the LGBT relationships because our community is used to hiding and finding yourself in the closet.

Please get help now for an extended, healthier, and more peaceful relationship.

Posted May 25, 2012 at 2:56am