PureVolume

Read this please!!!!!

Hi People as you all know my name is Yesenia. I am somewhat of a happy person and sometimes people think I am high on something but what I am high on is the love of God.

You see I grew up in church, having my parents "drag" me to church. Mostly I think because I didn't understand what the big deal was. I believed in God but it seemed to me that I was to little or to young while I was growing up to be important to God. I remember every time the service was over I would go outside by myself in the back of my church and walk. Not because I wanted to get away from everybody but because I felt invisible. I would always ask God why am I in church when nobody notices me. I mean my parents were and still are involved in church and my sister and my brother were always with the kida of the church hanging out I was really shy and I don't know how but I became really depressed; I always wondered if the world would be better with out me. Then I turned 11 and I started losing a large amount of blood through my menstruation ( once I had my period for 3 months straight when I was 12 and became anemic) and the doctors didn't know why so they made me take hormones to control it. The problem was that I couldn't handle the medicine and I would get really hyper one moment and the next I would want to just sleep and get extremely depressed. I remember one day I locked myself in the bathroom before any body got up and turned the hot water on and took every cleaner in the house and I tried to suffocate myself because I couldn't handle the pain and weakness any more. Then all of a sudden I heard my mom go to the kitchen and start making breakfast and she asked if I was okay and I couldn't go through with it. Time passed by and the August before I got to eighth grade I ended up in the hospital because I had only .05% blood any lower and I could've died. I remember the first night in the hospital my mom slept by my side and all I could think of was what did I do to be going through this and I saw my life flash before my eyes I thought I was going to die and then the last thing I saw was an overwhelming white light. Then I woke up and my dad walked near my hospital bed and said that he would rather have himself sick then see me sick and I thought to myself that just the fact that I tried to kill myself was very stupid and selfish and that God has everyone here for a purpose including me. As the day passed the rest of my family visited me and many people form my church went to see me ( I felt so stupid because I thought that nobody would have cared enough to see me at all, the devil is such a liar). That day I learned that God allows things to happen in our lives to teach us to depend on him and all that we go through he knows we can handle. As I look back now I know that God saved me from my depression and from my sickness.



Well all I want to do is remind all of you that God knows our hearts and the burdens we carry. When you feel alone and abandoned he is always there; when you feel like your being drowned by problems he is always there.

Thank you for reading this God Bless You.

I always pray for all of you hope you guys have a nice day.

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