A lEtTeR tO yOu!!!
Posted August 1, 2007
One family, one woman, one special girl, one day....
1998
That day I had a bad feeling since I woke up... but I didn't understand too much because of my age I guess....
The day before I wanted to do many things but I didn't know why I didn't do those things =S.. I don't even know now what I stopped myself =S... Maybe I mustn't...
What would have happened If I had told you that?... No one knows the answer... except for you, but you can not answer it now....
I don't know why I didn't want to cry that day =S... I just felt something strange inside me.. but nothing else... I made an effort to cry =S...
I regret!!! I wish time goes back!!!....
Now I think that if nothing would have happened, I wouldn't have what I have know... Is it supossed that I have to be grateful?... I don't know....
Many things have happened since that day....
I miss all of you because you were part of my life.. of my childhood... specially you two...
Everybody miss you... but you know you have someone here that is doing something in a perfect way... I imagine you are proud of her...
You take care of us... you are proud of all us... I guess...but.. Are you proud of me?... I don't think so... You know I made many bad things... you know what I should have lived...and I don't know why I'm still here =S... You know the answer, please tell me!!!!!... You are the only one who knows everything about me!!!... I'd like to talk with you someday... You were not my best friend, maybe she, but not you... But you are part of me and you know well that I'm an antisocial guy in this group of people I call family... and knowing that you know everything about me, you could understand my situation...
I guess that day changed my life completely... maybe in a bad way.. I dunno... Hell yeah!...You know why I told that!...
I think you are the piece of this puzzle that was left many years ago! If you were here, I could come back to my family...
Each one here lost many things... I lost my friends, but I gained good ones... I lost one special person, and I think I gain one good now (the time just can say more...), I lost one part of all, and I think that I'll never fill that hole!!! :(....
We miss you... I miss you.. Believe it or not jeje...
Are you angry because I don't go to visit you? =S... I hope not!... You know I don't like to go to those places...The last time I went there was to talk to you... the day I had to talk with her...Well, you know what things happened, and I think that was good because I learned not to be in love too fast... but well, you know what is happening now... and I think yu are the only one that knows what will happen bettwen us... I hope that last!... I know I said many things about love.. that I will never be in love again, that if I be with someone I'll never be in love too much... but I don't know... I think I'm losing the battle... I'm being in love again, and I'm afraid because of that... I don't wanna end up with a broken heart again =S... If something should have to pass, should be now... I guess... Damn, I admit it! I love her and she feels the same for me, but I don't know if that is too much as what I feel... I guess yes... well, I hope eveything will be OK!...
What do you think about my decission to study a career after all these years?... I hope you are not angry... I bet you my dad will be angry if I tell him about this... That's why I'm studying alone in my bedroom, and you know I do!... I hope you support me 'till the end, because I need someone, and you know that no one here believes in me!! Yeah... That sucks! Everytime I think in that my world falls down!... That's why I need your support!! Your two supports! Because I think that the others are taking care of all the others from here jejeje... you know what I mean...
Hey... about my music? Well, I'm doing my best and you know that... I want that you give all your support to continue with this, because no one here likes what I do, they just lie me saying that I'm doing things correctly and blah blah blah... you know this is my dream!!! You know this is what I like the most!!!
Well, this is getting to long... I think this was the only thing I needed to do to be happy!... Talk to you in an unusual way made me feel too happy, but that's the only way =S... Oh yeah, I have to go to visit to you, and I'll do it!... But I just can visit you because you are close to here.... Send regards to her and her family (I mean her sister too jejeje...) I can't forget those times... but well, I don't wanna remember all of that now.. you know why....
So, send regards to anyone that knows me there jeeje.... take care of yourself, and take care of all of us... and if you want of me too jeje... It's not too necessary, but just if you want ok? jaja... Maybe someday we will be together... maybe soon.. I don't know...
And tell her that someday I'll go to visit her even if she and her family are too far from here.... I'll do it someday, I promise!!!...
Well... take care... lots of kisses and hugsfor you all!!....
Love you mom!!!!
MiGuEl MaRqUeZ
