PureVolume

Education for LIFE!...hahaha!!!

Little Johnny was 7 years old and like
other boys
his age rather
curious.

He had been hearing quite a bit
about 'making out'
from the older boys, and he wondered
what it was
and how it was done.

One day he took his question to his
mother, who
became rather flustered. Instead of
explaining
things to Johnny, she told him to hide
behind the
curtains one night and watch his older
sister and
her boyfriend.

This he did. The following morning,
Johnny
described EVERYTHING to his mother.

"Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for
a while,
then he turned off most of the lights.
Then he
started kissing and hugging her. I
figured 'Sis must
be getting sick, because her face started
looking
funny.

He must have thought so too, because he
put his
hand inside her blouse to feel her heart,
just the
way the doctor would. Except he's not as
smart as
the doctor because he seemed to have
trouble
finding her heart. I guess he was getting
sick too,
because pretty soon both of them started
panting
and getting all out of breath.

His other hand must have been cold
because he
put it under her skirt.

About this time 'Sis got worse and began
to moan
and sigh and squirm around and slide
down
toward
the end of the couch. This was when her
fever
started. I knew it was a fever, because Sis
told him
she felt really hot.

Finally, I found out what was making
them so
sick......-a big eel ;had gotten inside his
pants
somehow. It just jumped out of his pants
and
stood there, about 10 inches long,
honest, anyway
he grabbed it in one hand to keep it from
getting
away.

When Sis saw it, she got really scared-her
eyes
got big, and her mouth fell open, and
she started
calling out to God and stuff like that. She
said it
was the biggest one she's ever seen; I
should tell
her about the ones down at the lake by
our house!

Anyway, Sis got brave and tried to kill the
eel by
biting its head off. All of a sudden she
grabbed it
with both hands and held it tight while he
took a
muzzle out of his pocket and slipped it
over the
eel's head to keep it from biting again.

Sis lay back and spread her legs so she
could get
a scissor-lock on it and he helped by lying
on top
of the eel. The eel put up a hell of a
fight.

Sis started groaning and squealing and
her
boyfriend almost upset the couch. I guess
they
wanted to kill the eel by squashing it
between
them.

After a while they both quit moving and
gave a
great sigh. Her boyfriend got up, and sure
enough,
they killed the eel. I knew because it just
hung
there, limp, and some of its insides were
hanging
out.

Sis and her boyfriend were a little tired
from the
battle, but they went back to courting
anyway. He
started hugging and kissing her again. By
golly,
the eel wasn't dead! It jumped straight up
and
started to fight again.

I guess eels are like cats- they have nine
lives or
something. This time, Sis jumped up and
tried to
kill it by sitting on it. After about a 35
minute
struggle, they finally killed the eel. I knew
it was
dead, because I saw Sis's boyfriend peel
its skin
off and flush it down the toilet.

Now that you've read it, post it and u will
have goodluck
in "gettin' sum" forever...Ignore it, and U
will
have a
bad sex life!!! lol lol SO REPOST THIS!!! WITH
THE TITLE
HOW A 7 YEAR OLD EXPLAINS SEX

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A million stupid questions!

The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly! - A Survey of My Life
Current mood: good



* So Basically... *

Name?: Reannan....

Age?: 17

Sex?: yes please!!!!...

Birth Date?: 24/02/1990

Hair Color?: Brownish black( but originaly blonde...so fuck my spelling LoL)

Eye Color?: Blue

Height?: dunno...jump for 5ft

Weight?: about that much

Body Type?: well i have an ass...tits....arms...legs...and a head....i'd say normal...^_^

Piercings?: ears

Tattoos?: Nope

What are you wearing right now?: wouldnt you like to know...tee hee

Hair style at the moment?: i got the lovely just got out of bed look goin..yea



* Favorites *

Soda?: Vanilla Coke

Food?: If ya can eat it i like it...but mushrooms and fish...and eggplant...are YUKK!!!

Drink?: water...OJ

Alcoholic Drink?: anything....but gimme a beer

Time of day?: 2:am

Season?: Winter

Day of the week?: monday...and friday

Song at the moment?: Kelsy--Metro station

Band/Artist?: too many to name....

Book?: dumping billy

Subject in school?: Math

Place in the USA?: never been...so i dunno

Place outside the USA?: my house....Woot for the land down under!

Color?: Yellow

Style of clothes?: i like to wear stuff....

Store?: dunno

Mall?: Rundle mall

City?: Adelaide

Website?: myspace

Magazine?: dont read that shit but cosmo i guess

Kind of pet?: dog...



* Worst *

Place to be?: in line at centrelink!

Class in school?: School!

Time of day?: when it gets dark.....im scared.... :0...not
really

Season?: Summer...too hot

Kind of pet?: CAT!!! haha...why did god make cats soft?...so it doesnt hurt ur foot when u kick em!..mwa ha ha

Drink?: ummm...idk

Food?: Shit on toast LoL

Mall?: marion...its too big...LoL...i get lost...*_*

Store?: dunno

Style of clothes?: Gay ones

Celebrity?: Hitler

Color?: orange...i just dont like it.... :)

Book?: dunno i fell asleep readin it

Type of music?: RAP!!! retards attempting poetry!!

Website?: gross ones....

Magazine?: all of em are gay!



* Daily Life *


When do you get up?: does that mean i sleep...??? lol

What is your first thought?: FUCK I WANT SEX!

What do you do first?: Piss

What's your usual outfit?: well i dont wear the same thing
everyday.....

What's the first class of the day?: breakfast...

When does school end?: not soon enough

Do you see your friends?: friends???...what are these friends you speak of???

What do you do when you get home?: sit my ass on this computer....

What time do you go to bed?: do you mean sleep??



* Do you...*:

Brush your teeth daily?: Yup....twice a day...

Brush your hair daily?: yea...

Shower daily?: of course!

Sing?: yup....in the shower...!

Dance?: Only when no ones lookin...

Party?: na not rly

Get drunk?: not rly

Have sex?: FUCK YES....but only with my SXC bf luke...love you

Read books?: all the time

Listening to music a lot?: every second of the day

Read magazines?: na...i got betta things to do....well not really...but i dont read that shit..lol

Go online a lot?: i live on line....lol

Stay on AIM all day even with an away message?: yep

Have a religion?: its called....worsihp reannan....he he he

Have an IPod?:nope

Want an IPod?: not really

Have a Girlfriend/Boyfriend?: YESSUM... :)

Play an instrument?: yea

Get sick a lot?: nope

Watch TV?: not alot...just HOUSE!!! WOOTWOOT

Like MTV?: its okay

Like VH1?: ummm...

Like the History Channel?: hell no!

Have Digital Cable?: i wish!

Have more than 500 channels on your TV?: FUCK NO! but i wish i only got 6...grrrr

Listen to the radio?: yea

Still use your CD player?: yea not much tho

Stalk people?: nope....but i know where you live...mwah ha ha ha

Have more than 200 buddies on your Buddy List?: not
yet.....will you be my friend....?

Have dial-up internet?: FUCK NO!

Have AOL?: nope.....how do i get that???? and what is
it???...LoL

Know HTML?: uh...kinda

Have a GPA higher than 3.9?: huh??

Get H's in honors classes?: ah...no



* Music *

Do you listen to Rap?: No!...Retards Atempting Poetry!!!

R & B?: No

Blues and/or Jazz?: a little...

Classical?: At times

Pop?: Yea

Country?: very rare...but

Emo/Scremo?: yea!!!

Heavy Metal?: Yes!!!!

Christian?: Yea a little

Techno?: no!

Reggae?: i have...

Broadway Musical songs?: uhhh.....no

Oldies?: Yea...sometimes



* In A Boyfriend/Girlfriend *

Hair color?: I like hair

Eye color?: hey if he can see...then its all good...

Tattoos?: not really into em...but idc

Piercings?: same as above...

Favorite Music?: anything....

Style of clothing?: no clothes...an on my bed...he he he

Body Type?: yay!!!...he has a body...lol

Personality or Looks?: Personality

Would you go out with someone just for their money?: No...wait...how much we talkin.....jkjk

Do you go on "Pity Dates"?: No

Does size matter?: no...but he's got a big one...he he he :)

Do they have to be popular?: Nope

Does the guy ask the girl or the other way around?: doesnt
matter...but im too shy to ask...lol

Where do you go on the first date?: anywhere...i dont mind

Kiss on the first date?: Sure

Sex on the first date?: ummm....wont i look like a slut??



* Right Now *

Do you think you look good right now?: Ohhhh yeah...in my
PJ's....lovin the look...lol

Are you eating something?: no...but now i want
breakfast...grrr u made me hungry...lol

Are you drinking something?:nothing...but now i want to be...grrrrr....stupid survey!!!

Are you IMing anyone?: nope...no one loves little old me... ='(

Are you talking on the phone with someone?: my dog....i speak fluent dog..woof woof

Are you talking face to face with someone?: your mum..she's
in my bead...

Is anyone at your house who doesn't live there?: na...but my
2 housemates are home...sleeping.....lol

What song are you listening to?: didnt i tell you that
b4...stupid survey...grrr...lol

What other websites do you have
open?:Myspace...purevolume...tickle..youtube....an some porn
site...jk jk

Why are you taking this survey?: Cause I got nothin better
to do...

Where are you going to post it?: Myspace!!

What are you going to do after this?: something else.....duh



* What do you Believe? *

Do you believe in ghosts?: BOOOO!!!! did i scare you!..hehe

The afterlife?: nope...your dead...live with it...ha ha ha
that doesnt make any sense...

Aliens?: E.T. phone home.....

God?: Yep

The devil?: hitler...??

Heaven?: ummmm...well i prolly wont make it up there...

Hell?: Hitlers house! but foreal....i cant go to hell...they have a restraining order against me....hehehe

Scientology?: Nope

Hinduism?: Nope

Buddhism?: Nope

Christianity?: Yup

Taoism?: Nope

Judism?: Nope

Jesus?: Yea

Nothing?: Shhhh...im the great believer in...if u just sit
here...and think about that sandwitch...it will come...hahaha

Reincarnation?: Nope...haha...ur dead...

Yourself?: yes...i am my own religion....worship the ground
i walk on...hahahaha



* Randoms *

Have you been on an airplane before?: Yes

Where were you going?: to see my dad

Have you been to another country?: well i went to mars
once...

Have you ever went to another country with your friends?: I just told you...MARS!!!...we had a party with E.T. and the marshns...WooT!


Have you ever partied in another country?: yea...those
marshons are party animals!!!...woot woot

Have you ever went on a roadtrip with your friends?: Not
yet....planning to tho

Ever stayed online more than 10 hours straight?: Yeah all
the time....

Pretended to like someone just to get popular?: yea...but it
didnt work....im a dork..now and forever...!

Talked about someone behind their back?: yea once or
twice....sorry

Had someone talk about you behind your back?: i'm sure its
happened...ima bitch...lol

Been in a fight online?: yea...a few...well i kinda start
em...lol

Been in a fight face to face?:Yup....fuckin bitches!!! grrrrrr

Gotten yourself involved in a figh?: loads of times...but i'm a nice person...really i am

Been called a slut/whore?: Yeah,but they're just jealous coz
they cant get any...haha

Been to Australia?: i live there....well here...ummm...yea

Do you like snakes?: Yep

Ever cried to get your own way?: yea...the other day...i
wanted the last peice of pizza!!!!!..i didnt get it...=(

Ever broken a bone?: Not my own....but others...yes

Ever had to stay in the hospital for more than a week?: yup

Ever had serious surgery?: Nope

Ever looked a porn online?: nope....but now that you mention
it...i might...lol..jkjk

Ever went to one of those "adult" stores?:
hahahaha...nope...not yet

Ever bought clothes at Walmart?: Walmart...?? dude i live in
australia....

Ever gotten clothes from the Salvation Army?: yes...ima poor
dork...haha

Ever paid more than 100 dollars for a pair of jeans?: hell
no!!...i dont throw money away...gosh...lol

Ever been on stage for any reason?: yep...cuz ima super star...lol

Ever been in a play?: yes

Ever been in a choir?: yes

Ever been in a band?: yep...OMG what is this...20 questions...gosh

Do you play, or used to play, an instrument?: yea

Gotten a Brazilian Bikini Wax?: gettin one next week

Waxed your eyebrows?: ouchies

Waxed your legs?: fuck it hurts

Cut yourself shaving?: once....that sure taught me my lesson...never to cut myself...its hurty...=(

Have you ever died?: yea...im dead now....ima ghost...BOO!

Was this survey an good at all?: ...not really

What time is it right now?: time for another sponge
bath....followed by some breakfast...

Mwah ha ha ha ah aha ha....OMG they repeat so many questions in this....oh well...peace world!!! keep smiling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =)=)=)=)

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WOOT WOOT!!!

YAY!...im goin to see parkway drive...oct 18th!

YEAH!

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omg...
its you again....
wtf..
havent i dont enough for you....
am i a slave to you?
never!
now u shall feel my wrath....
the scariest among all scary things.....
mwa ha ha ha *_*
PH33R ME!!!
pathetic mortals
i actually feel sorry for you guys...
your all lazy.....
weird...
stupid....
no lives....
so i'll do you all a favour...
a years supply
of.....
worms...
you can open a worm shop....
called....
'ive got worms'
dumb an dumber rocks....
actually u can just go suck
a sharp nail...
or a straw or something...
go taunt a mountain lion....
loser!....
nyaaaaaaa
you cant get me
neener neener!!
math is power!
math sucks....
wtf is math
you know...
i think some loser said....
i know...i think i'll invent math....
screw you...
an your newage nonsense....
i'll have a computer do my bidding....
it'll be the worlds first everything computer....
it'll give you llamas....
rub your feet....
make....pies.....
create chickens.....
you know......
all the important stuff...
i know what you must be thinking...
she's so smart...
and tallented.....
and for some reason she sings like an angel...
aww...your so sweet...
*blush*
tee hee
i feel speshul
but alas....
our journey must come to an end sometime....
dont give me that look.....
one more move like that....
oh hell no!
you did not go there.....

you know what?
YOU KNOW WHAT?
yeah...!
thats what i thought....
poo head...!
you stink...
i fart in your general direction...
your mother was a hampster.....
your father smelled of elderberries...
yea yea...walk away
dont ever come back
.........


awwww....where'd you go....
i miss you.....
now im sad......
please come back.....
fine....
im just gonna go...
and....
idk....
rob a bank....
bye....

^_^

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Age shouldnt matter

girl:hey whats up

boy:nm just listening to music

girl:i heard your getting you G.E.D

boy:yeah i thought it was a good idea

girl:it is im proud of you

boy:yeah thnx well listen i g2g bye
"last message received 12/12/07

"next day"

girl:hi

boy:hi whats up

girl:nm you

boy:i got my G.E.D

girl:OMG!!! IM SO PROUD OF YOU

boy:yeah thnx

girl:i have to tell you something

boy:go ahead

girl:well i love you i always have i care about you and your always in my heart

boy:thats cool i love you too but your too young your 14 and im 17

girl: but i love you age shouldn't matter

boy: i know u do and i love u but i found this girl and shes my age

girl: i just thought......(crying she logs off)

"the next day the boy turns on the news and hears that a 14 year old girl cut her wrists and wrote on the wall age never matters"

:the boy then receives a call from that girl and she says i'm leaving you for the one i love"

"that night the boy hangs himself and writes on the wall "shes right age doesn't mater i love you and always will"

IF YOU AGREE THAT AGE SHOULDN'T MATTER AS LONG AS YOU LOVE THEM THEN REPOST THIS AS "Age Shouldn't Matter"
&
A MIRACLE WILL HAPPEN AT 11:11pm

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