maybe im not done being angry
Posted June 16, 2008
i find it harder and harder to let go of my past. one i was not yet willing to part with. to hang up my patch infested vest and put aside my boot's. stash away my bullet belts and mini-skirts with holes. to stop the pain killers and all night beer fest's of irish drunkenness. maybe i wasnt ready to become who i am... nobody asked me you know. i miss being a cheerleader at the tattoo parlors and the 4a.m. phone calls. i miss the smells, the taste the fuck-off life style. maybe im not done being angry. maybe i still have things to loathe. maybe im not ready to accept the world and the way it is. maybe i just dont like the person i've become. if the old me met the me now i would beat the shit out of myself. i miss smashing beer bottles and pounding down whiskey. i miss nights that i cant remember all of what has happened. i miss being around alcoholics and knowing that we were all never going to be enough for anyone. it wasnt much of a life but it was mine. i created it and i thrived off of it. im not good enough for the lifestyle i have now. im just a pissed off irish punk hiding behind this fake facade of normality. i've lost everything i grew to know and love and for what?...so i can fit in with society. maybe society should fit in with me.
