- Listener
OSKO
Age: 16
Location: Moving to Vegas
Joined On: Feb 25, 2007
Occupation: i dont work
Website: www.myspace.com/the_osco
ekn'08
North Carolina
0_Cinderella_0
ohio
eyeswithoutaface
califorrrnia.
kolyeXbeatdown
810 [MURDER MIT]
Why?
Why is it when things are getting better when someone amazing happens toget really involved into my life the happen to sqeeze my hand and push me back into my misery?
Why is to happen to be that the person helping me is myself,
Why is it I that i bring myself and hold myself down?
Why cant I bare myself be happy the time i need it the most?
What am i waiting for?
Or is that just where i belong?
The road that leads nowhere
I,
Am walking through this road this road that takes me nowere.
That i led myself into.
You helped me get back up when i was down and i admire you for that,
You threw back down were i was when we started.
You took some of the things that ment so much to me in my life,
And took some of those tings that i can never get back.
You threw me around like a rag doll.
You made me realzie and (i hope that i may learn from),
One of the greastest lesson in my my life.
For that i admire you for it.
Someone once told me me,
"Oscar you can get anything you like as long as you chase after it"
I am now done chasing,
What i thought i had i learned that i dont have.
And the things i had i lost,
And now is when i need you the most.
You left me by lonesom self,
Im alone now fighting,
I now take the bull by the head alone.
I fighting this battle that seems to go now where and seems to never end.
What i got is what i deserved, and i hope i learn from it.
To those whom have been there for me during the hard times,
When my battle seems to end i am prepaired to give you all the respect and comfort that you have not been getting from me,
Doom to the fact that i am selfish.
Dear Cammille;
So Oscar your in love,
Yes i am i know i am this time,
Really i am happy for you i truly am,
Well i wish i could feel the same feeling i fucked it up i did,
What, what happened,
I fucked up terribly i would do anything to go back into time and save us,
I was hooking up with this girl i used to like,
Shit man you really did fuck it up,
I know i said no to her and i lost both of the girls isnt taht just so funny?
Dude im sorry to hear that,
Dont be sorry you have no reasom to be sorry so dont say that,
Speachless,
I just want to know how i could ever get her back,
I think you should tell her your feelings,
What if it happens to be that she just doesnt want to hear me out,
Just if i can do anything just tell me,
There is noting you can do other than just tell her i will always love her can you possibly tell her that?
Yeah i can try.
Thanks i really appreciate it,
Thats what friends are for,
Can i tell you something also?
Of course you can you can tell me anything,
I really did love her i would do anything for her she was my everything and i took advantage of her i didnt realize how mush i did love her,
Yeah it sounds like you do like her why didnt you just telll her about Ashlee?
I did i thought like i wasnt then i kept talking to her and we were talkiung about if we wanted to get back togather and i said i didnt know what to think and i stupid thinking it was ok talked about it and said maybe while i was with Camille,
How did she find out?
She read the comments,
Damn thats gott to suck,
It does i cryed for two days and still to this day it hurts me to think about it,
I am just to soft herted and i get hurt,
I am tring to not be so soft hearted,
I just tryed my best to not show it,
In realality it am broken she tore me to peices it feels like she tore through my flesh and bones and took my heart,
Wow thats got to hurt,,
It does very much.
Mercy is for the weak;
Oscar you fall to easy,
I know i try my best not to,
Maybe you should haha you mkae me laugh just how big of a baby you are,
Shut up!
Its true dont be mad i know the truth hurts,
Why do you always have to make me feel like shit,
Because you are shit you are nothing,
Dotn say that,
Its true and you know it why dont you face it,
I dont want to!
Just repeat with me:
I am nothing,
I am nothing,
I am worthless,
I am worthless,
I am tired and broken,
I am tired and broken,
I ahve no one,
I have no one,
I have never had anyone,
I ahd never had anyone,
She left me because im a fcuk up,
She left me because im a fuck up,
I lie,
I lie,
The love i had once was to good for myslef,
The love i had once was to good for myself,
I will never have anythin so great ever in my life,
II will never have anything so great ever in my life,
I am as low as dirt,
I am as low as dirt,
I deserve to be stomped on,
I deserve to be stomped on,
Didnt that feel anybetter?
No i fucking hate you!
You mean you hate yourself,
I do,
Yeah just go home you worthless peice of shit,
I i i thought this was my home,
Chhh, who said you were wanted here,
This will never be your home ever,
Were am i supposed to go then?
Dont you have friends,
No,
Shit then i guess your out of luck,
So Oscar walks out and walks around the streets aimlessly,
And his mind is just thinking;
Its to late she wont coem back,
Am i really worthless am i really as low as dirt,
So Oscar asks himself again,
Am i Oscar?
And he replied yes you are,
Will you stay with me forever?
No i wont why would anyone ever want to be with you?
So Oscar leaves,
And never returns,
With no heart,
