Sabrina Sabotage™ on purevolume™

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I'm Sabrina.

I am young and so very in love.

I am human.I make mistakes.

I am outgoing, yet shy, and I am stupid, yet smart.

I'm athletic when I want to be. I love football and soccer more than life.

Show me a good time. I'll be yours forever.

"Just shut up and dance." is my motto.

I apologize way too much.

Don't ask what color my hair is. I promise I don't know.

I use words like fierce and swicked. They tend to make me smile.

I love to read. Recommend a book. I'll go and read it.

I cannot stand poor grammar, or poor typing .

I promise you I have an opinion on just about everything. Just ask.

The few people that I consider friends are, without a doubt, the most amazing people I have ever met.

I will stand up for anything and everything I believe in.

I am a veg-head. I am an animal rights activist.

I am not into labels. I am not who or what you say I am. I am my own person. Sabrina is Sabrina, and she changes for no one.

I am fairly happy with the way most of my life is going.

Talk to me.

I'll talk back.

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May 3

I miss you.

I sit here on my bedroom floor And all I can think about is you How badly I want you here I need to hear your voice And your laugh

I'm not even sure of the time But I know it's late Yet I'm now in bed, not sleeping I'm too busy Wishing, hoping Wanting you

I twirl the necklace I wear in my hand And I wear your sweater Hoping they will comfort me Maybe even help me sleep But my efforts go unrewarded

Still, I lay here, wide awake With the thought of you In my head I speak the words 'I love you' Wishing you could hear me

Laying in bed I wish for your arms around me For your kiss For your hum that helps me sleep I wipe the tears streaming down my face

I miss you, dear I miss you

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May 3

Mother.

Please tell me why I hate your voice The sound of it The sting of it

Why are you so condescending So sarcastic So hateful

Please tell me why I hate your name The way it makes me shudder The way it makes me shake

Why are you...you So painfully angry So hurtfully mean

Please tell me why I still love you so The sound of you The sting of you

Why do I still care for you After all the nights I've cried After all the nights I've bled

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April 23

The incessant ramblings of a crazy little girl..

My mind races as the rest of me struggles to keep up. My thoughts, varied in subject ad rarely making sense, overwhelm me. Maybe this is the cause of my constant headaches, my thinking too much. I pace my floor and continue my incessant mind-wandering. What does this mean? What does anything mean anymore? Confusion begins to flow through me. Desperation follows soon after. Does all this mean I'm crazy? Fear settles in. I start to pace even faster, trying to understand any of the things racing through my mind. Feeling dizzy, I decide to sit down. I hold my head as I try to sort through all of the events leading up to this moment. How did it all come to this? Even more thoughts flood my head. I become frustrated at all these questions left unanswered. Scream, trapped in my chest, fight to get out. Anxiety creeps up my spine, forcing me to pace once again. Tears start to well. Am I merely a prisoner of my own mind? When did I become a slave to my thoughts and emotions? A scream makes its way up, through my chest, and then finally out of my mouth. If it can escape its prison, then why can't I do the same?

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April 22

Let it Be.

I watch you watching me. Those intense eyes staring into mine. I look away, walk away.

I try to stay away, for fear of my own wanting.

You plead for me. But I‘m not yours, not anymore.

I try to avoid those eyes of yours, unsuccessful, of course.

A hand on my shoulder. I’m forced to speak. Just tell me what you want, I say. Once again, you plead.

My heart stops as I mouth the words. It was done long ago. Can’t you just admit it to yourself?

I walk away, for fear of reminiscing.

A tear falls. I hear the splash behind me. It tears my heart in two.

Can’t I keep from caring? Can’t he understand?

It’s been done.

The words spoken. The actions taken. The hearts broken.

Let it be.

Don’t beg for my forgiveness, for I hate the word. Don’t look at me with those eyes, for I can’t look away. Don’t speak with those lips, for the sound makes me quiver. Don’t touch me with those hands, for the feel I can’t resist.

Can’t it be the last time? Can’t I just forget?

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April 22

Mm..

You tell me that you love me You swear to me that you do

You promise me you’ll never leave I look away, hiding the doubt in my eyes

You say that you know me Can’t you see you don’t?

Can’t you see I’m hurting? Dying even?

Behind the mirror I cry Screaming to break free

Behind the smiles There are tears

Behind the laughs There are cries

Behind the happiness There is sorrow

Can’t you understand? Can’t you realize I’m in pain?

I’m not screaming for my own pleasure. I’m not screaming for your amusement.

How can you just stand there? How can you ignore what I feel?

Do you simply not see it? Or do you simply not care?

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Red Burns August

ya im pretty tired i didnt sleep all that well either
maybe u shoulda crawled into bed with me and we'd keep
each other company lol. today just went to church then
out to eat now im gunna try and start some homework and
then try to enjoy my day i guess

posted 4 days ago

Red Burns August

ya i did notice u cut ur hair looks hot btw lol im ok
just tired still gettin caught up on sleep i missed
while i was in the hospital but im just tryin to relax
and do as much as i can for school and thats all i
really can do. how are u love?

posted 4 days ago

Red Burns August

well my first day home was good i slept in late and
just kinda enjoyed my day didnt work on school stuff
just enjoyed myself as much as i could which felt nice
how are u doin lovely?

posted 4 days ago

swiperrr

haha yeah. i do know that feeling,, its weirddd. im
really gonna have that feeling sooon too cause im
shaving my head for summer woo =] ha. but uhm okay
heres what happened. i stayed home on like wednesday or
something. i had bad sinus problems and alllergies. and
my mom convinced me to go to the doctors to get
medicine for it cause i had an exam on friday. so im
like okay whatever. and apparently my doctor thinks
that sinus//allergy symptoms somehow relates to asthma
symptoms..? hes like i think you might have asthma. and
im like uhh. i dont. so he made me take an asthma test,
i passed. then he gave me asthma medicine, made me take
the fucking test again, and of course i passed. and hes
like well i still think you have it. so he then made me
drive all over fucking town and get blood work and
xrays n shit, trying to prove that i have asthma. im
like your a fucking retard i know whats wrong with
me...so i ended up never getting a script from him,
wasting my whole day, and then just getting medicine
from the drug store. so thats why i was pissed lol. and
today was longggg. i just got outta work. how was your
day? oh the hair looks good btw.

posted 4 days ago

Red Burns August

ya my mind is just in twists right now school can kiss
my ass for all i care i just need to focus on getting
better. the only thing that scares me is the drugs i
hafta start taking they got some bad side affects that
could make me not have kids in the future so im kinda
worried about it just kinda scary if u really think
about it

posted 5 days ago

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