- Listener
ERINTHELOUD
Age: 15
Joined On: Aug 04, 2007
Love is friendship on fire.
..
-When I'm upset I like to clean & cook.
-I do wear glasses.
-When I scratch my chin I get the hiccups
-I know how to speak 'gamer'
-I only have dreams if I wake up then fall asleep again.
-I'm scared of being murdered.
-I think I have anxiety.
-I love writing but I think I'm really bad at it.
-Even when I say I don't mean something deep deep deep
down I really do mean it.
-I change my mind A LOT.
-My baby toe nails grow UP like a pyramid.
- I don't like talking on aim.
-I can never say G*d dammit or Oh My G*d! I always say 'gawsh'
-I hate my middle name.
Not a lot of people call me Erinbear anymore but when I was little thats what a lot of adults called me :D.
-I use a lot of metaphors to tell people how I feel.
-I still sleep with my stuffed Elephant Elle :]
-I keep a journal.
-I'm obsessed with movies.
I read these every week :]^^
Aug 10
My sleeping pattern is like wayyy off, I always stay up till 4:30 then I sleep until 4:00. That's bad.
Today my dad got on my last nerve, well actually everyday he gets on my last nerve. I'm getting really, really sick of it. It's like I say I hate it so much that there's not even a word for me anymore. Everyday he makes me do chores. If I don't do them he gives me this whole lecture how I'm "Lil bit, you only do a little bit" and so he calls me lil bit and I HATE THAT NAME. "Lil bit! Do the dishes", I'm just like SHUT THE FUCK UP! Then he tells me that I'm home all day so I need to do work. If I wanted to go somewhere or something then they wouldn't want me to becuase I have "chores" and once my mom even said "Erin you would make a great maid". It's like is that all I am. Did you only have me so that I could do work around the house. You don't make Emily or Eli do ANYTHING ANYMORE. I guess that's a little mean to say that my parents only want me because I can do chores for them.
If I have a problem or something usually it's a social problem like about a friend or a boy and they automatically think it's about them, like they think that because they told me to do something that I'm crying or something. I'm just like "Omfg like I'm that much of a brat to get upset because you told me to do something, YEAH RIGHT". And they have no respect for my feelings, no one listens if I talk to my mom about something shes just like WHATEVER ERIN JUST GET OVER IT and I say "Thanks mom that was great advice". Then if I have a really big problem I mean like I'm crying and upset my mom once told me "Erin your not Paris Hilton, just becuase you whine and cry doesn't mean you don't have to do your work" and I almost blew up.seriously. I wanted to yell I JUST HAD THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE OK? THIS GUY I LIKE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY BY PLAYING WITH MY MIND, MY FRIEND GOT MAD AT ME AND I'M FAILING JUST LEAVE ME ALONE. But of course if I said that my mom would probably say "Get over it Erin". Just thinking about this makes me sooo mad, I'm sick of getting mad everysingle day it really really gets old, and it is NOT GOOD FOR MY HEALTH
Aug 7
I just watched 6 episodes of Grey's Anatomy. Now I'm all Anatomied out :[, I love that show so much, I just think it's really inspiring. My favorite character is Izzy Stevens, I love how she's so personal with her patients. I mean that can be a problem sometimes but it can really change someones life, and how she's so traditional. The quotes in this TV show are amazing.
And it's weird how movies and TV can change my life, but trust me- it has. When I watched something it's like I absorb everything, the way the people look, the voices, the background, the problem, the dialog, EVERYTHING. And it's like I learn from it, like somehow I can use it for something else, for instance- my writing. I have a big problem with writing, it's my passion right? Well for some reason I just can't write and it bothers me so much, I know I can write something good, but then I don't know what to write and when I try to put my feelings into words it ends up sounding like a stupid 12 year olds diary entry about her first party. I need inspiration, and the more movies I watch the more I can figure out situations and I just want to know what's going on in everyones head.
Mostly I hate being 13, trapped in my house, forced to go to school and I can't do anything, I never have time to do really good stuff. I feel like I'm limited on stuff I can do because I'm just a teenager like if I don't figure out what I wanna do for the rest of my life then I'm gonna end up missing out on a lot.
I want to be a Writer,actress,director,surgeon,professional musician. And I can't figure out which one I want to do, I know everyone says "You don't have to know that now" But I like having a goal, something I can look forward to then just dating and driving, something I'm good at, something that can make me think about nothing else. Something that when all things go wrong I still have that. Like I just don't want to be a KID, I don't want people to think of me as an immature drama queen. I want people to trust me and I want to do whatever I want, I want to make HUGE mistakes, not just the"Oops I just told him I liked him". I want to SEE THE WORLD, not just Austin. I want to deal with problems that aren't so incredibly pointless and stupid. I'm sick of living the same day twice.
Aug 6
So I'm basically new to this site and already I think it's pretty interesting, I just think they need more artists on here.
Tomorrow I have to go to the orthodontist, then right after to the dentist. The way my mom makes me and my siblings appointments and schedules, it really really stinks, she always makes it on the worse day, she never tells us about them until two days before and she always schedules it at 7:30 in the morning.
My sister is being a major bitch, I mean the whole "best friends as sisters" thing totally works for me and my sister but sometimes I just want to yank on her hair. She thinks shes better then me and my brother becuase shes older, she does whatever she wants and even though she has graduated she refuses to find a good job and move out. We share a room so I'm getting pretty impatient, she really needs to move OUT. Sometimes she just gets all cranky and thinks she knows what shes doing, like shes on the cover of a magazine or something. She critizes me according to my attitude, she calls me a "mean girl" or a "dumb blonde wannabe".
Then theres my brother Eli, he's the worst brother anyone can have. I wish he was one of the "I refuse to hit a girl" people. If I look at him he goes "What are you looking at asshole" and I'm like "excuse me?" or if I argue with him he goes on and on and on and on and never stops and I just yell "DROP IT OK?" And he goes "No you fat bitch" and I just want to kick his ass, but of course he would kick mine. He is so rude. All he does is sit around all day and drink energy drinks. But of course since he's in band and is basically kind of a nerd, my parents treat him like an angel.
Then theres me. I have never done anything illegal or done anything that would get me into huge trouble. Although I do hangout with kind of a bad crowd, all my friends have smoked and done weed and gotten drunk and shit, and I tell my mom basically everything so she thinks I do what my friends do or I'm gonna do that or WHATEVER, but mostly she blames the parents.. it's always- "Where are they when they are doing this? You can't go over there anymore, I don't know WHAT your doing. They don't supervise you. NO" And all my friends never even peer pressure me or offer me anything because they know I won't give in, I'm basically the "goody-goody" in my group of friends, I guess not really the whole definition of the but I just don't believe in the whole "Do what everyone else is doing" idea. My mom is totally unaware that Emily has gotten drunk&high&has sex all the time and Eli smokes and does drugs and she is blind to how rude he is to me, and yet I'm the one that she can't seem to trust. I learned to live with it I guess, but I'm the only one she worries about.
And that only stresses me out and when I'm stressed out... my hair falls out :[
jervay
ERINtheJERVAYMISSESYOUso.
posted Nov 27
jervay
Erin the where have you been cause I miss you? t.t
posted Sep 08
jervay
you still haven\'t deleted me? OMFG IM LUCKY
posted Aug 14
jervay
Erin
posted Aug 06