- Listener
DEEP AND HOLLOW HEARTS
Age: 17
Location: Columbus, OH
Joined On: May 15, 2006
19 JD 88
United States
0verTheMoon
Mount Prospect, IL
Christian For A Lifetime
United States
cmarhoover
Chillicothe, OH
My name's Alicia, I like to sing, write and draw. I play a little bit of guitar, and really want to put a christian band together. (so if you happen to live nearby, and need a singer, look me up)ha ha... *winx* I'm pretty quiet if i don't know you, unless i'm in some wierd mood and my confidence is like Sky High. Hmm, i'm supposed to write things "ABOUT ME" but nothing seems to come easy. I don't want this part of my profile to be like everyone elses, i don't just want you to know the things that i do in my spare time, or what my name is. I want you to be able to read this "about me" and really know, about me. I want you to see inside, and i want you to feel a connection with me. I want my short words to grasp you with a force, a force that makes you WANT to read this without stopping. But i don't know what to tell you other than, this is me... look in my blogs, that's what i do. And if you read, "i pace myself for you" then i hope you view that ok, because everyone has a bad side, and thats mine. I think you should know that about me, not just the sunny side of everything. We all know life isn't sunshines and rainbows... well neither are people. ~love
Check this out.. it's my dads cd!!!!!
i pace myself for you.....
I pace myself for you. As I worry that you could not keep up. Forgive me for demeaning you, because you are fragile. And people like me, we take advantage of things way too often. Its as if we are two different races of some fantasy world. I am flexible at heart, can heal quickly, and am very outspoken in a very quiet way. You, you areEasily broken, most easily satisfied, and understand only what you feel. Or so you think you do. When in reality, your mind takes over. Things that you think are coming from your heart, are coming from your mind. And in our eyes, you're a typical person.
I assume that this story will soon turn around on me. For it may be a selfishness to call you weak, and portray myself as such a warrior. (Pride is an abuse, and sometimes im caught in the way of its fist. But I give myself only enough pride to keep alive; like a vampire who doesn't want to be. I starve myself until I can no longer.)
There are such days when I have pity on you. And I view myself much more equal to you. On those days, While you generally remain average in you're optimistic manner, I feel a bit lifeless, for I have almost no self-confidence. But today, I am aware of my power, and maybe a little over-secure about it too.
This is a PERFECT definition of me, not a complete definition, not even 20% of me is like this. But I think it's important to know every part of everyone, even the bad things and this-well this is my bad side. At least the one that I have figured out.
DUDE! I have friends!... ha ha ha
hmm, i'm so happy that someone added me... my purevolumes been pretty dead lately.
Total failure...
So, I don't know if Ill ever even play another gig...
I've heard stories about people who dropped their love for music because of one bad show, but now i understand them. I know the thought is stupid, to give up a love, or maybe even a talent that you possess because of one bad show. I don't know what im going to do.
I had a gig set for the mustard seed on the 7th. I didn't want to let Sue down. I was supposed to open for this girl from the increase... I immediately felt like i couldn't compare to her. But i was determined to play this gig. I only had 3 songs... And all of them were-well- not very well written. I had trouble with my words. But i prayed...
I Told God that i wanted to play this gig. I asked Him to bless me with a song, just one is all i need". And so it came down to the last few days before the gig, and I still had nothing. But when i prayed again, I was overwhelmed, i was writing a song, and for ONCE it wasn't a sadistic, sorrowful, gloomy song. I knew it was God- it was once of those moments where you just know it was Him. And so i played and played until my fingers blistered. And then my dad pulls out his song book, and he offers to let me sing one of his songs. I took the offer.
I expected a lot of people to be there.. i expected the gig to be pretty big, if not just normal sized. No one showed up, and instead of a relief, I was burdened with more stress. I felt like i had to impress this band. I had to impress Sue. *looks down* I failed... my fingers were sore, and weak... My face was red, and my voice was tired. On stage, i suddenly became depressed. Because i knew i couldn't just walk away. I'm sure it showed. My guitar playing was so completely bad, I- I don't even think my voice is good enough to overpower that. I'm sorry that i even played that night, no one showed up. I don't know if it would have went better with a bigger crowd.. (I feel more invisible, more comfortable in crowds. Even if attention's on me) I just don't know. I needed time to cope from that. But my dad had a gig the next night... and before i knew it people were calling me onstage. So it was two nights spoiled. Two places im afraid to show my face in. But it's only one year of my life. I'm 14 years old... I have time to get better. I have time to learn guitar. But i don't want to give myself time... My fight within will always be over time. I'll always want to be better NOW>
my favorite artist....
Yeah, i'm not really into learning about artist, that's completely boring. But i love the work of Maurits Cornelis Escher, i got a book with his pictures in it a few years ago, but it never drew my attention until just now. His work is like twisted...to where i don't know if i like it or not. His work was also in an awesome,yet weird, movie called, "labyrnth"...
(david bowie)
faith+CORE+drummer
Hey, Please take a listen to my new band (maybe even
add us) http://www.purevolume.com/trustfall thanx
posted Nov 07
markdoubleday
Hey there! I have some new music up soooo, if you have
a minute, I would appreciate a listen :D
www.purevolume.com/markdoubleday
posted Mar 30
faith+CORE+drummer
hey please add my new and upcomming band \"in response
to
stars\" http://www.purevolume.com/inresponsetostarsus
http://www.myspace.com/irts THANX
posted Jan 19
BillyA
well, I am actuallu just adding people so I can promote
my music. I am trying to get as many people to listen
to it as possible. can you go listen to all 4 of my
songs over at www.purevolume.com/billaftermath?
posted Dec 14
12dyingducks
hey thanks:) you too.. i will be hounest here i don\'t
no any of thoese bands ahah. so i will cheak them all
out.. i hoepe there goodlol.
posted Dec 10
andrew_cornelius
i\'m sorry to hear that but understand what it\'s like
to be in weird, awkward social situations. if you can
find a ride to the show at Joes, it promises to be a
good one. Wait til Wednesday from Indy will be there
headlining. either way, thanks for the feedback and
compliment-- i appreciate it. have a great Christmas!
posted Dec 10
andrew_cornelius
thanks. it\'s been a while since I played the Mustard
Seed. i haven\'t been there since it changed locations
actually. see you then if you\'re able to make it.
peace, Andrew
posted Dec 10