purevolume™

Chapter Title;

It turns out summer has brought about a new chapter to my life. Next school year I'll be a senior, 12th grade, my last year of childhood. It's a bit scary, especially without the support of my best friend.

What's worst than losing a best friend? That best friend not caring one bit once he’s lost you. I think that is worst, definitely. Losing people is always hard, but losing my best friend was a pretty hard feat to overcome. I did. I can honestly walk away happy now no matter what happens.

When I think over this year so far... I've gained and lost a beautiful but sluttish girl friend. I've gained and lost a best friendship that turned out to be bogus and hurt me horrendously in the end. I've gained and lost friends. I've gotten good and bad grades in school. I've made decisions that will effect my life forever. I'll never forget these days, good and bad.

Now, summer is here to wash it all away to a faint memory. My good friends and me cruising streets with the windows down and signing song after song. There is nothing better, there really isn't.

Summer is here, I needed it.

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Good times

Yesterday was amazing, it was one of the best times I've had with Juan. I bleached in highlights and dyed his hair, it looks awesome. Purpleeee. We rode around town for a little while, dyed hair forever, and the entire time he acted like his old self. I'm so content right now it's amazing. I've got my friend back as of now, and it's one of the best feelings in the world.

I can't wait until he's ungrounded so I can hang out with him all the time again :)

Idk what else to say, I think today will be a bad day at school, hopefully I'm wrong.

It's funny how just me and Juan getting on good terms makes my whole week. Right now things are going good. :) I wish I had just come to school without overdoing getting ready. Oh well.

Extension:

I've got a couple extra minutes in keyboarding and nothing to do but start a report I won't finish and will have to start again tomorrow, so bleh. I thought I'd talk about my plans this weekend! :) I've spent a lot of the week with Juan, so most likely he's spending the ENTIRE weekend with his girlfriend, I mean hey I think I deserve a day, but whatev xP So my plans consist of sleeping late, staying out late with my now home for the summer college buds, and basically doing nothing of importance but goofing off :D

Off to second period.

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curve ball

Well then, since my school has officially blocked purevolume I have to write my blog entries and save them as drafts in my email address then post them afterwards on my profile.

Right now I can't wait until something starts going good for me. I feel like I'm losing everything when honestly I'm probably losing nothing at all. I've been over reacting a lot lately, but then again life has pretty much sucked. I've felt ditched, insulted, treated like I didn't deserve, I mean so much has been dealt to me the past couple months I almost can't take it.

I just find it harder and harder each day to find someone I thought genuinely cared about me still caring. I hate losing people, it's the worst feeling in the world. I don't want to lose anyone, and shouldn't considering the circumstances but I'm still afraid. I'm afraid things are going to get worst, I think something is wrong but I don't know how to fix it. Then when I do think I fix it things go back to how they were. Idk, there might not even be a problem. If there is one, I know it is with me, but can I fix it? Not to mention, is it even worth fixing considering everything is so messed up already.

I need something productive to do with my time besides wallow in my own self pity. I feel like one big disappointment.

*sigh*

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I love it when...

I find out things are good. I have some awesome people in my life right now, and I'm changing for the good. The best friendships are ones you can learn from. It turns out I have a lot of people that care about me, and hopefully I won't jeopardize that by resurrecting my past decisions that have caused problems before.

I've finally learned how to not care when I shouldn't, and to not fret over the little things. I mean, I still act like myself and it may seem I still do but honestly, deep down, I don't.

It's amazing how one minute life can be hell and the next it's all good. I have the best friends in the world, and some other good people in my life. Everyone makes mistakes, and I've realized an unforgiving person is a lonely person.

I love my friends more than life itself, that's no doubt. I know they will always be there if they can, and they know I will always be there no matter what. I'll drive anywhere, do anything, and give up anything for the people in my life right now. I couldn't be more lucky.

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Here's the dealo

Right now, I'm pretty pissed. A douche keyed my car for no apparent reason. This is the second time someone from that group has fucked up my car, it was egged like a month ago and the egg's acid stripped my paint so bad it had to be completely repainted. I've never even spoke to either guy before but for some reason they think it's okay to fuck up my shit. I'm not taking it anymore, if it happens again I'm going into more drastic measures.

I have to get most of my car repainted now instead of just the bumpers which were fucked up from two accidents, one I hydro-planed and the other some lady drove into me while I was in reverse, and she had stopped to let me go too, HA, damn life sucks. Idk, what a waste of a thousand dollars for a new paint job just to get it completely demolished by accidents and stupid fucking idiots I've never spoken to before. If something doesn't come out of this, like 300 dollars or 400 dollars from this keying incident, then I'm getting back at ALL of them.

That's for sure.

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