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Peanut Butter Jelly Time ♥

Words not only help us express emotion, they distance us from it as well. They can be a useful safety net, protecting your heart from overexposure, parcelling out your true feelings in carefully crafted syllables. Rather than gushing sincerity. They can also be misenterpreted, doind damage by created an impressin in someone's mind that wasn't intended. Sometimes, things are better off left unsaid.

Whenever students meet their untimely demise in a horrible accident, from a random act of violence or a rare, untreatable disease, they are instantly elevated by teachers, friends and family into prized pupils, filled with promise- whether they actually were or not. They aren't remembered as a busload of mediocre students who perished in a crash, but are magically transformed instead into honor roll students in death. We need lost lives to have meaning. It's a comforting delusion, really. Like dead-spin. Unfortunatley, you aren't around to appreciate it.

Trust is not a given. In any relationship, it is the hardest thing to gain and the easiest to lose. In fact, the only words harsher that "I don't love you anymore," are "I don't trust you anymore." The former has everything to do with everyone else. There is nothing you can do about a change of heart. The latter has everything to do with you.

We all want what we cant have. In fact, most of the time we only want things because they are unavailable or forbidden. To justify the purchase, we convince ourselves that what we want so desperately, is also, what we need. The trouble is, impulse purchases can lead to an expensive case of buyer's remorse.

"It's not you, It's me,"

      - these are the most dreaded words spoken in any relationship. If you hear them or if you find yourself wanting to say them, you can be pretty sure it's over. A soft landing is being prepared, but the end result is not in question. Whoever offers the duplicitous explanation on the way they want out, may not be sure of what they want exactly. But they are sure of what they don't want - you.

Talk is cheap. If it wasn't, people might not toss around "i love you," like a marked-down phrase in a sale bin. Being stingy with your feelings, saving it up for a worthwhile moment, should make it all the more meaningful to the person you eventually tell, no matter how long it takes. If you are with the right person, it is an investment worth making. The trouble is, sometimes you can wait so long to hear it, that you go broke inside.  

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you left me here with nothing to lose, and as i take it all back, id still take it from you. And im writing the same words everytime but i guess it never mattered to you. And im NOT sory it didnt work out this time. So you can deal with your regrets, and ill deal with mine. This time, its plain to see, after everything youve done, i will be the one left laughing. And i hope you meant it, everything you said. So dont tell me that its nothing, i can see its killing you. And i took every word oyu said as gospel...took it stright to heart. you beat me and you broke me down and now im falling. If im falling, pretend you dont know. You remember that cold night where you held my hand under the street light and swore you'd never let go? well i guess while i was counting stars, you were wishing for a rainbow to come change things in your mind. ANd i know, that this time, this is for you, the one that made me laugh, then you made me cry. and for the one that faded out and never said goodbye. And its unfortunate, that everything i never said, could have gotten through your head for once. So close your eyes tonight, and sleep in your bed alone. Ive been holding this inside me for longer than youve known. And im talking to you like you'll care what i say.  ishould have known better. THis is getting worse. So i trust you..fault you, and push you away..and how many times will it take for you to admit that i am still exactly like you?! And how many nights can i sleep by the phone, waiting for you to call me, only to say "this is hopless." Your so good a lying, it could be your degree. Then you could minor in messing with me. I gave you a thousand reasons why.. and you gave me an excuse on why its not worth your time. Im not waiting on you to call me back anymore, because i dont need it .I wont waste my days thinking of you,, because your not worth it. You gave up too early. YOu left me down before i was even off the ground. You really disappointed me. Yeah, youve got cute, now i just wish you'd get sane. It was my nerve to think that i was better than this, really i was just part of the plan. Its so easy to lose yourself in what you wanted it to be. Well i wish i could say that this all seemed worth it but, by now id just be kidding myself. Maybe im that running joke that you tell all your friends. And they all laugh, and they never know how you ripped out my heart, and no matter how hard i try, i cant get it back again. So dont try and say that this "was meant to happen", because if it was, i think id know by now. Im sick of you always letting me get close, but somehow you still shoot me down. Im not like everybody else, but i though you'd know that by now. I turned off all the lights, and tried to make myself dissappear to you. I turned off all my phones, but your calls still came through, and you said "i dont see why you have to be such a bitch about everything". i went to bed and pulled the covers back over my face, and ill stay like that until you go. Dont tell me "were just to good of friends", because i know thats never how it is. And now i see, that the only thing you want from me is another reason to let go. I gave you everything, and you took nothing less, but i cant waste another second trying to make this last.

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