Conflicting Feelings
Posted April 22, 2006
Yeah, so less than 5 minutes ago, I posted a blog, that said that I had to give up my "addiction", But I will be completly honest, I really dont want to, because I love that feeling that I get from it. That natural high, the butterflies that dance inside your stomach, the headspins from what seems almost too good to be true, what probably is too good to be true. Right now my thoughts are being torn in two completly different directions, there is a part of me that is trying to be logical, saying that, it will never work, this addiction will only cause me problems in the future, that I should just let go because it is impractical. Then there is a part of me, being torn in the complete opposite direction. a part of me saying that I should go after this, because it makes me happy, because I love this feeling, because it simply is what I want not what I necessarily need for survival, more, what I want for my own sanity. So, I am having completly conflicting feelings. And to be honest I am not sure what I am going to do. Typically I am a very practical person... who tends to think and reason alot, but right now I want to be spontaneouse, I want to do something I don't normally do and follow my heart................................................................................. AHHHHHHH! I am so damn confused!
