PureVolume

life as a mixtape

is life as a teenager supposed to be this complicating or am i just making it complicated? i think i see things different than other people. i mean i see life as one humungous mixtape. theres a song for every moment. theres lyrics for every situation. theres pissed off break downs for every bad break up. for me, everything relates to music. ill talk to my friends about anything and im sitting there thinking "hey thats like this one song from [ insert band here ]" music has been the only stable consistent thing in my life. music has never let me down, or talked shit behind my back, told me id end up like my mother, ditched me for their boyfriend, or let me go through a bad time by myself. music has always been there. if it wasnt for music i probably wouldnt be here today. music got me through some tough shit. i cant even begin to explain to you how extreme my passion for music is. you know that sensation you get in your chest and stomach when you meet and new boy or girl and you realize that you really like them, where it kinda feels like youve been kicked in the stomach by the giddy police? well i get that all the time, but its when i discover a new band or buy a new album. i know how lame that must sound but thats just how it is. i love just sitting down and listening to some kick ass band and just dissecting their songs. acknowledging every chord, analyzing every drum beat, recognizing every lyric. its just amazing to think that such a devoted group of people can come together and work so hard on it, and just create something so beautiful. i hope they know that their efforts are greatly appreciated by people like me. it seems like no matter what happens in life i am left wanting more music. i crave the music as if i hadnt had a cigarette in two days. i wonder what kind of person i would be without music. would i be some psychopathic killer? or maybe i would be danielle instead of the danie that i am. meet danielle: the cheerleader, the prom queen, class president. the straight a student. pretty much everything im not. and then there is danie: juvenile delinquent record, highschool drop out about to redeem herself in two weeks time, piercings, dark makeup, dark hair, potty mouth, and not to forget is inlove with this little thing called music. can we see the difference here? i cant even imagine danie as danielle. what the hell was my mother on when she cursed me with such a horrid name? oh wait i can answer that one... meth! are your teenage years supposed to be all about questioning everyhting and self discovery? i hope not becasue mine are nearly over and i have yet to discover who i really am. as far as i can tell, im danie, i love music, and i view life in one odd way. im sitting here wondering if im the normal one and everyone else is strange, or if im the odd one. do normal teens think about the shit i do? and why do i have to think about all of this now? i just want to know the answers to everything. i am tired of being left with all these questions and receiving bullshit answers/lies, and i have yet to find the ultimate song that can answer these questions for me. well, i dont think one song could possibly give me an explanation for my complicated as fuck questions, it would more or less have to be the ultimate compilation of mixtapes. i must seem crazy thinking all of the answers to life are in the music, it makes sense to me though, musis is my life therefore thats where the answers lie right?

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