Members: Danny - Gideon - Jeff - Garrett
Okay. So. There has been some changes. Winds of change. Quarters and nickels flying about. This change has brought with it many things, mostly of a musical nature, but sometimes it means the garage gets an overhaul. If you are reading this looking for a some kind of description, or excuse, or review by somebody we don't know, or a secret decoder ring message; you are in luck (answer revealed later on).
In order to fully understand that which is Goodbye Valentine, you have to begin at its- beginnings... But that shit is boring, so we can skip to the good part. Formerly known as Large Marge, the boys rocked out across the nation with wreckless abandon. Danny B. and Gid-O were slapping so many people a day, they lost count in Portland. But, like many things that tickle the nose, the Marge machine ground to a greasy halt.
D and G were not discouraged! Their appetites for music and slapping would not let them sit idly by and watch scores of fans go un-slapped. Armed with new material and microphones, the miracle of MySpace threw them a guy named Jeff from the state of Maryland, who hates music, but loves playing the drums. By way of Santa Cruz, a man named Garrett either:
A) descended from heaven, or
B) rose from fire and brimstone
...and added his (un)holy axe to the band's already massive sound.
In conclusion, Goodbye Valentine is the truck that goes through a red light because the driver saw the turning arrow and thought it was for him. Powerful, high-profile, gas-guzzling (or expelling), and slightly confused. Not about our sexuality, but as to who wants to jump on the bandwagon next. Anyone who wants to donate a wagon to us, get in touch.
It's only a matter of time before we are slapping/rocking in your town. Bring your dueling pistols.