The Horrisonance Experiment Part Three
Posted March 8, 2007
Day 13: Columbia, MO (City motto: Smack dab in the middle o Misery!): We were supposed to play at Mojos today, but the promoter cancelled due to inclement weather. This makes four cancellations on an already relatively short tour. Luckily, we were within shouting distance of our usual KC hospitality stop Aunt Lindas. Id venture to say that nearly every band has their own Shangri-La - a place where they can spend the night in luxury, resting and revitalizing those sore muscles and spotted livers, and padding their scurvied bellies. Aunt Lindas is this place for us. There is always plenty of food, entertainment, and privacy (a scarce commodity on tour!) at Aunt Lindas. Everyone gives a silent hooray when we find out we are staying there. It is a welcome respite on any day off, or in this case, a cancellation. Experiment Notes: Ah Kansas City / Going to get my baby back home / I'm going to Kansas City / Going to get my baby back home / Well its a long long time too / My baby's been gone
Day 14: Kansas City, MO (City motto: Dont let the rats eat your face.) So it seems like part of KC is being bombed for rats and other vermin after parents recently found the nose eaten off their newborn while it was sleeping in its crib. This actually happened weeks after we left, but I felt compelled to mention it here. A friend of mine acquired a rat as a pet not long ago, but I still find them hideous. They say rats will force weaker vermin of the pack to eat foodstuffs in question, to see if they die. Now thats just not American. As for the actual Day 14, we spent it almost entirely in the basement of Aunt Lindas playing Wii baseball and watching DVDs on a giant home theater screen with nary a rat in sight. Experiment notes: If it moves, kill it.
Day 15: Joplin, MO (City motto: We have nothing to do with Scott Joplin!): All this time, I was sure Joplin was named after the famous rag-tician Scott Joplin. I even went so far as to play bits of The Entertainer during our set at the Foundry. Turns out, Joplin was named after some reverend in the late 1800s. As for the show, it was nearly a repeat of the Omaha show near desertion on account of harsh weather. Not one to be taken by circumstances, I hopped off stage and provided the half dozen spectators with comfortable bar stools to observe our set. For our grand finale, I brought everyone onstage, bands included, and we had a bit of a chaotic percussion jam at the end of Strange Days. Actually, chaotic would be somewhat of an understatement. If youve ever seen 2001: A Space Odyssey, where all the monkeys go crazy around the monolith and start bashing rocks with bones, thats kind of a good place to start. Experiment notes: The only thing better than a Coca-cola bar is Christian rock climbing.
Day 16: Lafayette, IN (Overheard in dressing room: Its not really a college town.): Interestingly, we had played at Downtown Records five years ago. But it wasnt called Downtown Records. It was called Tazzmas Rock-o-rama. It was as if Spencers Gift Shoppe had thrown up all over a rock club. The new owners of the DTR have since done away with all that nonsense. And strangely, it seemed a lot smaller this time, probably the way everything seems smaller when you revisit it five years down the line. The show was great lots of kids, the promoter nice and cool. I did fall off the stage, maybe twice, and there is video out there. Feel free to do a Myspace search. Experiment Notes: Tone down the tambourine a little.
Day 17: Muncie/Indianapolis/Bloomington/Louisville (regional motto: Home Sweet Home): This is where the Horrisonance tour officially ended. We said our goodbyes to Wax on Radio and Forgive Durden the night before and went our separate ways. I cant remember much about coming home except that it seemed like home had suddenly become Hoth. We had apparently been dumped on (with snow) a few days before in ungodly amounts and the city was just now able to dig themselves out. Try to manoeuvre an 18-passenger van and a planet-size trailer between two six foot snowdrifts and you get the scale of our predicament. I cant remember what I did on the day off, but it probably involved baking bread. Because thats what I do when Im bored. Experiment notes: Salt inhibits yeast rising action.
Day 18: Indianapolis, IN (Indigenous architecture: box store): It was a cold and bleak midwestern winter Sunday. The kind Nintendo and the Sci-Fi Channel were made for. Its always hard coming home for a day, then having to get back up and belt it out again, but when the weather is like this, its really hard to get motivated to do anything. Theres nothing like freezing all day, then sitting in a freezing club waiting for the heat to kick on. It makes one feel like one would rather deal with hurricane weather. Our performance was, well, nice. We pulled out a few oldies like Aventine, and snuck a cover of Ziggy Stardust into the mix. I can never seem to remember the words. While not cramped, the crowd was a rather nice size, considering the weather and the day of the week. Experiment Notes: It goes screwed up eyes, screwed up hairdo. Like some cat from Japan.
Conclusion: While hindered by extreme weather conditions, the Horrisonance Tour of February was a modest success. We would like to thank everyone who allowed themselves to be a part of the experiment, including the extraordinary fellows in Wax On Radio and Forgive Durden. With a little luck, youll see us out and about again before the years over. If youre lucky.
