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Arranged Marriage

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Arranged marriage continues to be the traditional way of conducting marriages from your ancient times. Much have changed today and today in many parts of the world especially the western part, marriage decision is completely left to the two those who decide to live together based on love, trust and commitment to each other. This love, trust and commitment is built over time by knowing each other. But in majority of the Middle East and south Asian countries marriage is still fully arranged or otherwise partly arranged through the elders in the family by other authorities as well as the so called gatekeepers of the society. These individuals have considerable relation to the family based on religious and caste based structures. - Clase Para Matrimonos y Parejas

Let's quickly understand what an arranged marriage is along with what are the positives and negatives with the arranged type of marriage. Further if you decide to go for an arranged marriage it might be also wise to try taking a little tips and guidelines with this type of marriage. To start with, we can define arranged marriages as marriages which are primarily decided by organizations other than the two people who are actually going to get married. It is also called as prearranged marriage. Because this kind of marriage is arranged by someone apart from the persons actually marriage, the process of courtship is completely curtailed or shortened to some great extent. Now these "other persons" in highly traditional societies might include parents, family elders, relatives, priests and religious leaders. In a a bit more liberal atmosphere we can see the utilization of the assistance of matchmaking agents, family friends and matrimonial sites. It's been seen that the matrimonial sites offer no less than some scope for that couple to know each other before getting married. Other avenues, to a huge extent are out from the direct control and influence of the actual people getting married.

Arranged marriage: Positives from the arranged type of marriage

Now let's analyze the positive points with the arranged type of marriage. The foremost and foremost thing that has mind when we discuss the positives of arranged marriage is the full support from the families from both sides. Arranged marriages are decided after great deal of meetings and discussions among parents and elder members in the family and therefore the chance of any discord in the family as regard for the marriage can be mostly eliminated out. Further these marriages are built on a solid foundation of two families coming together and therefore the actual people marriage get lot of confidence. In fact the trust one of them increases to a degree because of the all round approval. Arranged marriage settings actually eliminate lot of burden and uncertainty from your lives of the unmarried girls and boys. For example if the boy or the girl fully understand that they are going to get married only through arranged type of marriage then they don't have to take the trouble of hunting their life partners by their particular. They can concentrate almost all their energies on more purposeful and fruitful endeavours like advanced schooling and a career by leaving the decision of their marriage completely for their parents. The other making use of your arranged marriage include financial and physical support from the families for the newly wedded couple with regards to starting a new household of their very own. Moreover the extended family also provides a cushion in relatively tougher times. The future benefits of an arranged marriage incorporate a secure environment for the next generation under the watchful eyes from the grandparents and a large family.

Arranged marriage: Negatives of the arranged type of marriage

Even as have discussed the positives of arranged marriage in great length we ought to also be aware of the negatives and shortcomings from the arranged type of marriage. One of the primary drawbacks of the arranged marriage is that the most important decision of your person's personal life is taken by someone else. There is no work involved from the boy or the girl to find their life partner and there isn't any personal relationship between the boy and girl according to love, understanding and commitment to a live a life together. The boy and girl are strangers to each other and they don't know the needs and wants of each other. This can latter cause lot of distress and may become a prime reason behind marital discord. Further there's no guaranty that the trust between the families and elders which can be seen in the initial days will continue for long. A small issue one of the senior members of the family can get blown out of proportion and then the large egos with the parents and other senior family members can completely destroy the marriage. Further arranged marriages will be the biggest cause of dowry demands and dowry related problems. These marriages are the biggest hindrance to private development and independence in everyday life. The girl and the boy become influenced by their families and they become incompetent at even taking the smallest decisions of their life by their very own. Further there is great deal of interference from the families even in the most trivial of matters and the boy and the girl never learn how to sort of their lives how they want. Socially also arranged kind of marriage is the biggest hindrance towards a society which is depending on equality among the people. Arranged marriages will be the biggest propagators of the caste system and conservative faith.

Arranged marriage: Methods for arranged type of marriage

Every system have their positives and negatives. If you have decided that arranged marriage is the only way that you can get married in today's circumstances prevailing in your life then it would be smart to increase the positives from the arranged marriage and prevent the negatives to the maximum extent. The foremost thing that you need to do is to become accountable regarding your own marriage. Don't leave your decision of your marriage on other occasions hands. It is after all your life and therefore your opinion needs to be respected. This is something you should communicate to your parents and elders inside your home. Next is the way to obtain getting a good match. Nowadays when communications occur at lightning speed it is good to use tools like online matrimonial sites for searching your daily life partner. With this mode you'll have some control in the selection process as you get a chance to directly get in touch with the other person to whom you will get married and further addititionally there is chance of brief courtship through this mode. At least by this method it is possible to know your life partner just a little better before getting actually married and you will also minimize dowry related demands and problems.

Further check the horoscopes for a match if both the families insist on it. This may increase the confidence on the list of families as well as the people who are getting married. It is highly desirable to keep at least 3-4 months period gap involving the time the marriage is proscribed and the actual marriage date. Besides courtship and understanding each other, this time can be utilized for checking and rechecking the antecedents of the people who are getting married. This period can be also a good opportunity for the two families to mingle with one another and create enough rapport to ensure that any future misunderstandings may be avoided. Finally the most important point to remember is that the success of any marriage whether arranged or love marriage is dependent upon the two individuals who are actually engaged and getting married. It is definitely in their hands to really make the marriage a big success or perhaps a big failure. - Clase Para Matrimonos y Parejas

 

Posted Oct 11, 2015 at 1:33am

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